The singer made her solo debut in August with the single ‘Are You Awake?’ and is currently on a first solo headline tour.
“I had the idea for a while of a song that had the tagline of “what a shame”, but in a sarcastic way,” Mayberry said of the new song. “And the word “shame” having a double meaning – the shame you feel and internalise, but what a shame you feel like that and can’t change it.
She added: “Looking back on a lot of my life in terms of relationships, sexuality and my sense of self in the world, there is a lot of shame associated with that. I came into my teens in the early-mid 2000s, a time period we now regard as a bit of a shithole in terms of gender and media messages (post Woodstock 99, the dawn of sex tape leaks, Girls Gone Wild, etc etc).
“What was deemed “attractive” for women and girls was quite disturbing in hindsight, and that’s what went into my brain at a formative time, romanticising bargain basement, local band boy versions of Reality Bites Ethan Hawke. But now I know better, my wiring is still to find those things attractive on a cellular level. I know not to want those things academically, but emotionally, romantically, sexually, I have been trained to find those things valuable and attractive.”
Mayberry first announced her solo music venture and Chvrches’ hiatus back in July, though assured fans that Chvrches is not over.
“I met Iain [Cook] and Martin [Doherty] when I was 23 — a little baby of a person, in hindsight. Looking back on what we’ve achieved together, so much of it doesn’t feel real or even possible,” she wrote on Instagram. “I am so proud of all the chapters our band has been able to have and I am so grateful to my bandmates for taking me on that journey with them.”
“We are all confident that the Chvrches story has many more pages yet to be written,” she continued.
“For a long time, I couldn’t imagine ever doing anything outside of Chvrches. Since I was 15 years old, I have always, only, ever been in a band,” she wrote. “I always wanted so badly to belong somewhere — to be one of the boys, and to fit in.”